if you think i am just pure lazy to have left my blog vacant for so long, i just have to say.. yes you are perfectly spot on. there's so much worthy to be written about but i did not put in the effort to maintain this site, it's my bad. let me find the joy of typing my thoughts once again.
first of all, though it's already been some time back, i think i'm still obliged to thank all who has came to attend yours sincerely's 21st birthday party. my apologies if i've not kept all your stomach filled, but i know you know that i've tried my best being a host for the first time. yes, i just know. walking around, back and forth, there's not really much time for mingling, but i still hoped everyone enjoyed this little gathering regardless.
now formalities aside, there's something more important and that is.. my confession as a perfectionist. you're right, those who may seem over critical about all the minute details, does not accept mistakes and are hardly easy to please. a deep self reflection after going through my words with lionel had me realised this is just as deadly a mistake itself. yet harmful words often comes before encouraging ones, and the result..? guilt.
against the good of this man, all guilt automatically magnifies. on the way back home today with him, my initial intention to tell him how fortunate i feel then to have a loving him beside me turned into an outburst of tears and emotions. well, if you do not know, i actually cry a lot.. just like a lil girl.
to all the men reading this, tears are not weapons of a girl, neither do they fall for no reason. yes, i mean even PMS is considered as a reason. if a girl you care for ever tears for you, feel for them like it breaks your heart to see her cry; hold her tight like she'll be safe in your arms now and forever; comfort her like she's worth your full attention and sensitivity. it takes a heap of patience and faith, but it's definitely better than flustering over what to do in your mind leading to yet another thing to cry over. that is, the worry that you'll be mad or frustrated by her now. does it make sense?
alright back to me, so i cried.. until it's past Christmas time. no countdown. but a piggyback home with lots of love and hope :]
merry christmas. i love you.
